The Cure For Anxiety And Panic Attacks: Laundry Detergent

I almost slapped myself on the forehead this morning in a “Duh! Why am I always the last one to get the memo?” moment. I was on the treadmill, exercising in front of the TV, when a Gain laundry detergent commercial came on and taught me the secret for finding emotional peace. I can't believe I waited nearly 47 years to hear the answer. Are you ready to hear it? The answer might not be what you expect. It has nothing to do with God, anxiety medicine, or overcoming emotional baggage from childhood. The key to breaking free from anxiety is laundry detergent.

Let me digress for a moment to explain what causes anxiety in some people, and then I'll get back to talking about the laundry detergent.

Fear is hard-wired into the human experience through the hormone adrenaline. When you run from the saber-tooth tiger, your body releases adrenaline, which causes your heart to pound and your skin to sweat. It gives you either a panic attack (negative interpretation) or exhilaration on a roller coaster (positive interpretation), depending on your mind-set at the time the hormone is released.

Thus, fear is a normal human physiologic experience. But some people over-experience it because of their emotional triggers. Things happen in life that cause them to feel weak, insignificant, incapable, stupid, responsible, guilty, ugly, unwanted, dirty, etc., just like they did at times when they were kids. In turn, those unpleasant feelings lead to a sense of vulnerability (a close cousin of fear). In turn, feeling vulnerable and anxious leads some people to eat compulsively, take drugs, consume alcohol, gamble, hoard, cut, etc. In a way, these behaviors serve as distractions. They're momentary attempts to escape the negative emotions.

Now, allow me to get back to the relevance of the laundry detergent. TV Commercials frequently play on our emotions. They first create a need in us (e.g. the need to feel powerful and in-control because, in reality, we feel weak), then they suggest that their product can fill the need. In the case of this commercial, the announcer said, “[Gain] is for women who like control.”

The commercial might as well have said, “Do you feel out-of-control in your home, buried under mounds of laundry? Don’t worry if you feel like a slave, out-of-control and helpless, you pathetic loser. Just use our detergent and you’ll feel awesome again. You’ll even be happy, slim, attractive, and confident, like the woman in our commercial.”

Seriously, for your own good, become a wise and discerning critic of these absurd TV commercials. Don’t let the advertisers manipulate your emotions. They know you have a tendency to feel fear and anxiety when you feel out of control. If you didn’t feel this way, you might not overeat or use other substances as emotional crutches. Am I right?

When the advertisers tell you their product will cause you to feel “in control,” don’t believe them. If they manipulate you in this way, you have less control than ever. The truth is only GOD Himself is in control, no matter what you eat (or don’t eat) and no matter what kind of laundry detergent you use.

This week only, please accept a FREE tool that could help you break free from eating for emotional reasons, in case that's how you deal with anxiety. It's a FREE e-booklet on Kindle, but you don't need a Kindle to read it. You can download a free app from so you can even read my e-booklet on your pc.

The Eden Diet: Condensed Version FREE on through May 11, 2012.

The Christian Post